Untitled Rubbish

I’m tired of here, I’m tired of humanity and all that we stand for and all that we don’t, and these eyes heavily laid upon the green messy carpet outdated for years but who would notice– not I sah, not I, for I want what everyone else wants, making it all go to shit because we compete for this or that, food on the shelves a plenty to make us sick, houses depleted and ugly to make us sick, medications full create all the same get those dogs and cats on the same medications side affects side affects as long as the pocket presents the side affects do not exist until they actually happen and then they’re sorry so sorry they ever met you and that’s what I think when I walk, trying to keep up with the dogs because I am so lost in the darkness of disgusting humanity– disgusting adults– disgusting teenagers– disgusting children– we regulate animals  but not humanity no snip snip opiate here, opiate there, don’t worry about the side affects for they do not concern you nor your child so they don’t actually exist until they actually do– all of the muck and dirt combing through my mind as I walk behind them until I reach the smells and the blackness of the sky and greyness of the sea at a time when most humanity is not to be seen for it is too cold and too dark, only then when I smell the seeping clams and muscles while the dogs trot amongst their mother rocks and dirt do I realize that life isn’t alway to shit because nature is there such as the ocean to bring me back to the one and all source loving and true– t’aint nothing more true than the grey ocean sans line to see not to cross, and then I cross it unbeknownst and perhaps I want to go further as the mermaid sirens call me as the gulls flap me as the ducks twirl me to want and I want and this– that– is all I really do want, not this construction not this green paper, not this fake job, not this disheartened look, not this soiled house crumbling to the marshes, but the ocean that appears at night like I could walk across it and through it and disappear to something more and true